Dear Allyn's Cafe: It's Not Me, It's You
Posted Monday, September 3, 2012Dear Allyn's Cafe:
It was good seeing you again. You're looking well. You remodeled since we last saw each other and I see you've changed the menu. The Mexican entrees are gone, and now you exclusively showcase all those Cajun-American themed items you'd wanted to emphasize. Good for you.
We've shared some good times together over the years, you and I. When we first met, I genuinely enjoyed some of your food --mostly the Mexican items you chose to remove. The sausage in your Red Beans and Rice is still pretty good, though you continue to be a little too heavy-handed with that spicy heat. You always loved leaving my lips tingling after a meal, Allyn's.
At times, you'd get a little jealous whenever I spoke of the Cajun cuisine I've enjoyed at other restaurants, and I remember the look of sadness on your face when I declared that nothing served in Ohio will ever hold a candle to the food in New Orleans. I regret saying that aloud, Allyn's. That was a little cruel of me. But sometimes honesty is the best policy, no matter how much it hurts. And today, I'm afraid I'll have to hurt your feelings again.
It pains me to have to tell you this, but I feel we've grown apart over the years. You're just not the restaurant I knew and loved years ago. You're trying to make changes and I respect you for that, but I feel you're not addressing some key issues about yourself: you're in denial.
So here it is, Allyn's: your food kind of sucks now. I know, I know. Please don't cry. I'm sorry to be so blunt. But in our last encounter, when you served me a $17 plate of Blackened Gator that was so overcooked and chewy that my girlfriend quipped, "it was like eating a rubber band;" a brick of burnt jalapeno cornbread; and a fiery, overwhelmingly spicy sauce that forced me to give up a quarter of the way through, I finally realized you really don't care about my feelings anymore.
When your server looked down at my barely-eaten plate and the charred underside of my cornbread, he didn't say a word, as though he were well aware of your weaknesses but had been beaten down by them, a broken young man now simply going through the motions, hoping one day you'll deliver better food so guests don't take out their displeasure on him.
Allyn's, you can't just change your menu around and hope things will magically fix themselves. You've got to rekindle your passion and instill a basic sense of quality control. I've been so disappointed in you the last couple visits; no one deserves to be treated that way. So I've decided to give up on our relationship and never step through your door again.
There, there, Allyn's. It'll be better for both of us. Here, have a tissue.
3538 Columbia Pkwy, Cincinnati, OH 45226513- 871-577
Rating: 1.5 out of 4
= Outstanding
= Good
= Fair
= Poor
The best TACO joint in the city. I go there as a treat to myself every Monday. TEX MEX TACOS are delicious culinary treats that look beautiful and taste great. I'm so impressed with this place that I never explore the other items on the menu. If you don't get your taco fix here, you're losing in life.
posted: Tue., Apr 27th, 2021 @ 2:37 PM
My Wife and myself dined at Ferrari’s on Saturday and the Food and service was great/ I had the Butternut Squash Ravioli with misc nuts and sauce and it was the best meal I’ve had there/ My wife had the Fish and Vegetables and was very happy/ I also got a couple of their pizza and olive loaves of bread/ The bread is always a hit at work.
posted: Mon., Nov 23rd, 2020 @ 1:14 PM
@Rick: Thanks for the suggestion! I'll have to remember to give them a try.
posted: Sat., Nov 21st, 2020 @ 9:06 AM
Try Joe's Pizza located at Airway and Smithville Rd. You might like it...That's one of favorite haunts. I definitely think it beats Cassano's.
posted: Fri., Nov 6th, 2020 @ 4:19 PM
Hands down the best Indian in the area. I have yet to find their yellow Punjabi dish anywhere. It is my favorite, and what keeps me coming back time after time. I think I have been here over 100 times. I love this place.
posted: Thu., May 28th, 2020 @ 12:03 PM
I found a gyro I keep thinking about
https://www.yelp.com/biz/tazikis-mediterranean-cafe-cincinnati
their lamb gyro is about 2-3 bucks higher in cost than a gyro elsewhere - B U T - it is made with whole pieces of lamb meat, not the lamb and beef loaf that all other Gyro joints in Cincinnati seem to do
it is a chain. A minus for me, and I suspect for you as well.
But its good.
really, really good
one caveat: skip the baklava as it is not made in-house
posted: Mon., Dec 9th, 2019 @ 12:43 PM
I'll take your word for it, then.....it is fairly close to work so it'll be an upcoming lunch
I also need to try out this little taco wagon near Quatmans in Norwood
posted: Mon., Sep 9th, 2019 @ 6:21 PM
Hi @TJ - We were pretty impressed with the quality of the items, which I think justifies some of the pricing. I really liked the house-made tortillas and their salsas. Chilero offered some extra little touches that were a pleasant surprise. :)
Just by way of comparison...that same week we'd tried the new Mazunte location downtown...and our experience at Chilero beat them out.
posted: Thu., Aug 29th, 2019 @ 10:18 PM
Great food and fantastic atmosphere
posted: Wed., Aug 28th, 2019 @ 8:29 PM
Seems very pricey for a mostly carryout/counter-service joint
posted: Wed., Aug 28th, 2019 @ 5:51 PM